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| So, i didnt get much sleep last night. Exactly 2 hours worth, if you call that sleep. Some call it naps i call it.. blinking :O
Anyways. Love? I was thinking about it. As i was watching my typical idol kdramas, im wondering if there is actually that perfect person, soulmates as they say, that is meant for each other? Or are these things extinct already?
Howdoes one define being in love exactly? What exactly isss love? As quoted in one of the dramas, love is a feeling that is a combination of all feelings; hatred, sadness, joy, etc. for without them there can be no loving. Riiiight.. So basically i love, everybody? Since i do have combi feelings for almost everyone. *eyes rolling here*
In my POV, i think love is just bullshit. something Shakespeare made up to make his poems sound good. ha-ha i mean jeez. Back in high school, i could belive in you know, one day meeting prince charming; mr right; the ONE. but now as i grow older, reality hits. There is no such thing as THE ONE. There is however, the one .. you can tolerate living the rest of your life with. The one that makes you feel that you can care for. But love? Mr right? Bah. Fairytales if you ask me.
To think that of all people, i who fell in love at such a young age and got betrayed by this special word.. still would believe in it 10 years later. Well, it's enough of that.
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Even in tv shows/dramas of any kind, they never show you what comes after "happily ever after". Right when the prince & princess finally meets each other, falls in love, gets married. tadaaa happily ever after? Right. What about politics? Money issues? Understanding each other?
And love at first sight? What does that mean exactly. Seeing someone for the first time, and instantly falling in love. As though you've known that person your whole life? Doesnt that make love based on appearance? jeez. I may be an oldie here, but i believe in the old fashion way where boy meets girl, then progress from friendship to courtship then maybe marriage? I mean whats better than to 'fall in love with your best friend' isnt it?
But these days, there's the INTERNET. So it's back to, appearance. pfft. and the way the person types. I mean, how well can you actually know a person by the way they type? Heck, i could be a fat hideous man acting like an innocent girl (reference : GAMER) for all you know. But too bad for you, feelings of yours have been invested into a typing relationship is it not? Sucks to be you right about now id say.
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Pardon me on the angry rantings. Im just going thru a badddd storm of a week. Sigh. Not being able to sleep doesnt help either :/
That and the fact that im getting real sick of my "status". | | |
| Sooo.. As usual, nothing good ever happens after 2 am.
Was on my drama marathon when suddenly it hit this, sentimental spot, that somehow i never realized i hid deep down inside me. Thus, begun my reflections and soul searching. Really dumb i think. Hence, the first sentence above. Anyways, one really cant move forward when one keeps reflecting on the past right? I mean continuous scrutiny on one's mistakes and endless flashbacks on ones past is just gonna make things harder and well, just that much more depressing aint it?
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Looks like i'll be starting on my New Year's Resolution List early. Teehee! ...
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Less than a week left to Graduation day. I've beenkinda self preparing with my full schedule of self groomings. Cleaning up ALL stray hairs from every part of my body. (ouch, even the thought of it reminds me of the pain), attending to my pimples & obvious scars, Trying to squeeze in last minute sweat routines and fad diets. All this to make sure i dont look like the frickin whale that i looked like on my brother's big day. URGGH.
Thinking about it, i havent even thought about what's to be worn under my gown. But i'm definitely wearing my extra high heels to make me look extra tall, PRAY i dont trip and fall upon collecting my cert :O
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Really, i dont know if i'm excited or just overly worried about the day coming. The pressure of having to find a job is starting to affect me. Additionally, the fact that im not really ready to jump into this line of work yet doesnt help at all. Then again, when exactly is anyone ready eyy? Sigh, i dont even have a portfolio thanks to my PC crashing and wiping everything clean.
Im sticking to the excuse of i dont know where or when to start. Not the one where i actually just dont do anything about it.
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I've just got too many things planned right now. Honestly idk why i keep piling up things on my plate when in the end i'll never actually finish up any. All these hopes, dreams and wants but not enough to push me all the way. Hopefully with age, i'll change. But who am i kidding. I'm already old enough to have been changed.
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I just noticed i keep straying from my title. Thinking about what i want to say when i type out the title but end up not mentioning it at all because im too caught up with other rambles. PFFT. This somehow applies to my daily life as well. Unfortunately. Sigh. (Refer to previous post & title if ydk what i meant)
.. DONE rambling. Gotta get back to my drama. heee. -END- | | |
| Today, I was woken up by someone who made me really pissed within 3 seconds without even having to be near/around me. jeez. I hate it when someone takes advantage of me. Especially when it's someone close enough to you that you cant say no to. SIGH.
Because of that, i didnt get my regular 13 hours of sleep and only got 7 :( Normally, i am able to just go right back to bed, but because i was mad and disappointed my head was just too jumbled to fall back into sweet nothingness.
And, to add on to the stress, the game that i've been playing for so long, and enjoying it.. has finished. As in, i completed all 100 levels. Life does seem kinda pointless now. It's like, i've got nothing to rock me to bed, nor nothing to wake up to. Such a series of disappointments donchu think? :( I mean for a shallow person that im being right now-lah. teehee!
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Being awake early, i decided to complete my delayed house chores, and i managed to finish them up, well kinda. ;) Sooo... i decided to update myself with the fashion world and well, the "happenings" about town. Seeing how i've secluded myself from just about everything or anything that requires me to actually break my routine of sleep-eat-drama-eat-sleep.
While blog hopping, i realize how much skinny girls CONTINUOUSLY complain about being fat. when there's literally no fats on them at all. It makes me wonder if in this generation anorexic is the "in" thing / or these girls have not met any fat people / they dont know the meaning of fat, but use it continuously to be cool / they just like complaining cause theyre craving that attention.
Dont get me wrong, i've got nothing against fat people (i'm getting there anyways) but whats with all the skinnies calling themselves fat? Its like a twig calling themselves a tree. -___-" refer to illustration below of me mocking skinny people calling themselves fat (:
Another side note, I notice that boys/men are seriously like wine. As they grow older they tend to look... better. Not all, but most of them. They go from dorky cute to good looking to hunk to handsome to mature. Like, seriously most men i know seem to look good for their age. Women on the other hand.. it's like we follow a bell shaped curve. Once we reach our peak, its just downhill from then on. Makes me fear myself of like, 60 years from now.
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Totally forgot to mention in my previous post though i posted on that day itself, SELAMAT HARI MERDEKA! hahaha. Gone are the days when back in high school everyone was all hyped about the celebration as we get to decorate the class and have performances of which we'd get awesom food hampers if we won. Also, whats not fun about not needing to study for a week at school but instead play dress up and hang out with friends? :D Those were the days.
Although i do not want to admit it, but i am definitely considered as the 'old' ones already seeing how im thinking that kids thee days will never know the meaning of congkak, pepsi-cola,duck duck goose, hen & wolf and etc. Now it's all about cutting the rope, shooting pigs with birds or slashing fruits/zombies/animals. Back in my time it was a miracle if a 3rd grader has a hand phone. Now, it's a miracle if a 3rd grader doesnt have one. wow indeed.
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Hmmm, i actually got more to say but in the midst of typing all these i kept getting distracted by other social medias. so yeah, i've lost my trail of thoughts. I was pretty sure i had some good news. But thats all gone now. Maybe i'll remember it for the next post (: Toodles!
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| Sooo.... Raya at Sha's still one of the bests. Its always good when there good great friends and great good food around. :D Pictures, will be uploaded one day. hahaha. Unfortunately im not the type of person (unlike some few that i know of) that actually writes a draft edits & saves it then publishes it one week later. i dont have that sort of ego patience.
Also, editting the pictures will take a leeetle time. ;)
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Here i am now working on something that i've abandonned about a year back (im not talking about this blog mind you) and im sitting here for two hours cracking my head for names. i absofuckinglutely HATE coing up with names. Im not the type of person that is creative in that way, or the type who can make everything sound cute, or perfect. sigh. how i wish i was though. HMM.
So yeah, i'm working on this personal project of mineeee... which who knows, hopefully it will finish by the new year or miraculously before this year ends :D
Now, all i need is the NAMMMME. and maybe someone to help with the codes :X hahahaha.
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Im going furniture shopping tomorrow :O Totally random i know. My dad has just sprung it on me.. he has never asked me to go furniture shopping with him.. EVER. why? i wouldnt blame him cause i kinda tend to forget the budget and theme or whatever as i get easily distracted by the pretty pretty designs that'll prolly never go together with another pretty pretty design. teehee!
Then again, maybe it's just because im THAT easily distracted :p
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ok. done mumbling. back to brain cracking. Im just gonna go lie in bed playing phone games till i ko-lah. hahaha
PEACE OUT! | | |
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